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Psychopath Freaks that Deceive to Control us

 

Renette Vermeulen

           

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“SOME PEOPLE CONTROL FOR DECEPTIVE PURPOSES WHILE THEY SAY THEY DON’T,” someone said.

I would say people deceive others for controlling purposes.  “Control” means, “dominate, force, rule, manipulate, oppress, dictate, keep back [from our own decisions,] restrain.”  People are controlled by evildoers because they are often physically stronger, more informed, skilled in deception and underhandedness, and intelligent.  (They are actually evil geniuses that often hide behind the guise of decency, stupidity, and humility.)  Because they also hide behind innocence, goodness, meekness, etcetera, they are in a perfect position to deceive and control their unsuspecting victims to cover and execute their constant abuse and many secret agendas. 

The goal of deception is to blind us so we cannot know and understand what controllers are actually doing.  To various degrees, all control freaks are consuming psychopaths who shamelessly devour the spirits, souls (minds,) emotions, bodies, lives, time, and finances of others, (1 Ths. 5:23.)  Nothing and no one can ever satisfy them or be enough for them.  Spiritual, family, and cultural life must always revolve around them.  They have no conscience or sympathy for their victims; and no empathy for those who suffer - except the pretence of empathy to deceive, control, and consume even further. 

Life is speckled with deceptive controllers.  Politicians deceive us to vote for them so they can remain in control.  Church clergy deceive believers with false doctrines, false authority, and false church norms and forms to control their time, money, and spiritual, emotional, and physical lives to keep themselves in power.  Parents deceive children to mistake their control for ‘love’ and ‘care,’ while they craftily install fear of rejection into them, and utilize physical and emotional punishment to make them dependent upon their love and care, and thus, they control them for selfish purposes.  Just as violent control through abusive parents and spouses, cunning over-protecting, over-bearing, ‘over-supplying’ and ‘over-pacifying’ or “babying” parents make their children either into selfish or passive adults, who struggle to function Godly in society and in their families, and simply can never say “no” to deceptive control.  It is almost ‘natural’ that, either openly or secretly, such controlled people turn into consumer-controllers themselves.  Abusive spouses too, often pretend ornate ‘care’ and ‘concern’ for their spouses to control them through the same type of dependency and lack of self-worth, so that they can continue unhindered in sin such as gambling, alcohol and drug abuse, fornication, and so on.  The list of controllers and their methods of control just goes on and on. 

 

Humanity seems to be “exercised” in deception and control because those who can deceive us to submit to their control actually think “for” us and will eventually direct and engulf our entire lives. (Prov. 23:7, “For as a man thinks in his heart, so is he.”) Hence, the great number of believers who suffer from ‘unworthiness,’ and thus remain physically and emotionally dependent upon their controllers.  This is why deceptive controllers such as parents, spouses, and church clergy form our cultures, characters, self-worth, aspirations, theologies, political and other ideologies, etcetera, by enslaving us to their deceptive control.  (Rom. 6:16, “To whom you present yourselves slaves to obey, you are that one’s slaves, whether of sin leading to death, or to obedience [to God] leading to righteousness.”) 

Conversely, Godly love will always teach us to think for ourselves and thus, to take responsibility for our own decisions and lives.  Satan is the tyrant that drives with his whip; Jesus Is the Life-Giving God Who leads with His staff, (Jn. 10:10.)

People submit to deception and control because ‘causing trouble’ and ‘disrespect’ by “withstanding” and “confronting” deception and control, (which are Scriptural commandments,) is the difficult way that does not make resisters popular, (Mt. 18:10-15; Jam. 4:7.)  Yet, Jesus said the following about passivity, “The servant who knew his master’s will… and did not do it, shall be beaten with many stripes… To him who knows to do good and does not do it, to him it is sin,” (Lu. 12:47-48; Jam. 4:17.) 

So, resisters of deceptive control are often labelled as controllers because they refuse to submit to real controllers, who turn themselves into ‘victims’ when they cannot get their way with them. 

We do not control others by saying “no” to their deceptive control.  Neither do we resist control freaks to control them, but if possible, to show them their sin with the motive of restoring them to God and to us, (Rom. 12:18.) 

We must obey God Who commanded us to confront, expose, and flee from unrepentant abuse to benefit our own souls, (minds and emotions,) lives, finances, and especially our eternal lives - and of course, to warn and protect other people who can fall victim to these controllers, (Mt. 18:15-20; Eph. 5:11-13.) 

If we do not resist deceptive control, (especially in our relationships with church clergy, elderly parents, spouses, adult children, job situations, etcetera,) they will enslave us to their dictates and we will live a life of loss, embarrassment, and aggravation.  Even worse, constant sinful control will eventually deplete us of self-control and personal decision making.  

 

What must we do to recognize, repent from, and escape deceptive control? 

Þ As in all difficult situations, we must first seek and obey Jesus and take personal responsibility for our lives.  We begin by prayerfully making God and the Truth of His Word our highest priority with every step we take, (Prov. 9:10.)  Either we subject our thoughts, and thus our “minds” to Almighty God The Holy Spirit and His Scriptural leading, or we choose to believe the lies of controllers and even deceive ourselves to believe that we are in ‘control’ of ourselves and our lives. 

When we bow to or follow control freaks who subject us to their will by thinking “for” us, we are, in reality, bowing to the dictates of Satan.  And we know that the devil “does not come [to us] except to kill, steal, and destroy,” (Jn. 10:10.) 

God’s holy “control” is His Godly reign over us through Scriptural obedience, which leads to salvation, redemption, spiritual and emotional growth, and blessing in Christ, (Jn. 16:8-16; Gal. 3:10-14.) So, God’s holy “control” is absolutely necessary for our well-being as a whole and it spells holy, Godly “love and care” on a multilevel.  Ps. 72:18 declared, “God only does wondrous things!”  So, if we think God did bad things to us, we should think again.  1 Jn. 1:5, “God Is Light, [He does not merely ‘shine’ light,] and in Him there is no darkness at all.”  Rom. 8:28, “[But] we know that for those who love [or actively obey and follow] God, all things work together for good…” 

Þ We must also realize that the Scriptures are all about God-reliant self-control.  God never gave us a mandate to change or control other people.  God only gave us the right and power to change ourselves, (Jn. 1:12-13.)  We must obey the Scriptures to try and reach the lost, but God allows us to make our own decisions because He gave us all the great gift of personal choice, (Jn. 1:12-13.)  God does not take hostages to heaven.  He calls, and we either follow Him willingly or choose to follow Satan to hell.  Someone wisely said, “God changes your circumstances by changing you.”  This means, we are not in control of our circumstances and other people, and God always requires us to work “with” Him in obedience to His Word to change us, (Rom. 12:1-2.)  Thus, we cannot expect God to forcibly submit other people to His will because He is not a tyrant.  God has a millions ways to protect us from harm if we submit to His will for us in every situation — and, eventually, to change it all into good for us in ways we cannot perceive now, (Rom.8:28.) 

 

Here is what God has empowered us to do to change ourselves in the power of the Holy Spirit.  Prov. 16:32, “He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he who rules his [own] spirit [by submitting to God,] than he that takes a city.”  Rom. 12:1-2, “Present your bodies living sacrifices… to God… And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, [your thoughts and beliefs,] to know [and do] the… will of God…” 1 Cor. 9:27, “Discipline your [thoughts to keep your minds sound] and bring [them] into subjection [to Scriptural truth…]” 

How do we do anything “in the power of the Holy Spirit?”  We pray according to God’s revealed will, (the truth of His Word,) and then completely reliant on Him, follow through as the Spirit reminds us or teaches us obedience to His Word, (Jn. 14:26, “The Holy Spirit will teach you all things and bring to your remembrance all things that I [Jesus] said to you.”)  

I.e., we can pray as follows.  “Father in heaven, please open the eyes of my abuser so that he or she can understand exactly what they are doing and be saved from this sin.”  (Jn. 16:8-14, ‘The Holy Spirit came to convict the [whole] world of sin, righteousness [in Christ] and judgement [through wilful disobedience.]’)  Hence, every single person “knows” that he or she is in sin, although this is not a guarantee that the person will obey the Spirit and repent.  “And give me the wisdom to deal with this situation according to Your will to glorify Your Name.” (Jam. 1:5, ‘If any lacks wisdom let him ask of God… and it shall be given him.  Jn. 16:14, “...The Holy Spirit will glorify Jesus…  Mt. 18:15-20, “If [someone] sins against you [seriously and unrepentantly] go tell him his fault between you and him alone…’)  

 

All these commandments call for constantly resisting deceptive control, which will bring persecution because we choose to live Godly, (1 Tim. 3:12.) 

So, our outward circumstances might never change due to the responses of other people to the conviction of the Holy Spirit, while we must still continually resist all evil so that God can change us “from glory to glory,” (2 Cor. 3:18.)  Similarly, God will not do anything for us, which He had commanded us to do.  We must diligently and boldly do our part, while in decided faith, leave what only God can do in His most capable Hands. 

2 Tim. 1:7, “For God has not given us the spirit of fear but of power, [Godly] love, and of a sound mind.” In this passage, Paul possibly “admonished Timothy as he was prone to timidity [fear] and may have been reluctant to accept greater responsibilities, [fearing adversity for actively resisting deception and control.]”  [S.F. Bible footnote, 1991.] 

May God give us the grace to withstand those who try to control our minds and thus, our lives on earth and even our eternal lives.  For He has commanded us to “have no other gods before Him,” (Ex. 20:3.) 

We are committing idolatry if we allow people to oppress us to sin, or lead us into sin. 

In conclusion, a word of caution.  We all consciously or unconsciously compare our lives to those whom we respect, as they often model what we expect from Godly people.  Looking at our own lives, which are often broken, disrupted, and anything but perfect, we might then feel inferior when we see believers that are so “in control.”  This is when we must remember Jesus’ own life here on earth and all the terrible adversity and affliction Jesus and His disciples suffered because they refused the religious control of the status quo.  Most dangerous, psychopath, deceptive controllers never suffer persecution for righteousness and therefore, they “look” so peaceful, “in control,” and prosperous, and “sound” so joyful, etcetera.  It is wrong to think evil people are all erratic, blabbering fools.  The most dangerous kind of deceptive controller are always perfectly “in control” and “at peace” with themselves. 

However, living in the spiritual Kingdom of God does not place us in perfect control of our lives, situations, and of people.  It is difficult for oppressed, persecuted, suffering believers to remain “at peace with themselves” or their situations.  E.g., it is easy for false preachers, who are polished to perfection by deception, and who are, therefore, never confronted with their deception and control because they preach popular sermons, to “look” self-composed, holy and serene.  But this is how the unassuming Paul preached among the believers in their assemblies, the ‘ecclesia.’  He explained in 1 Cor. 2:3-12, “[As I decided to preach only God’s entire truth,] I was with you in [physical] weakness, [natural human] fear, and much trembling, and my speech and preaching were not with persuasive words [as those who skilfully preach false sermons,] but in the demonstration of the Spirit and of [His true] power...” 

The true power of the Holy Spirit always focuses the attention on Jesus and His Word, and not on the instrument who brings the Word, the prayer — or who, often unknowingly, manifests the gifts of the Holy Spirit, (Mark 15:15-18.) 

Paul and the other apostles also had to “grow” in wisdom throughout their lives by “testing everything to see if it is from God [to] abstain from all evil.”  They also had to prayerfully seek God through the truth of His Word with the motive of obeying Him in the leading of His Holy Spirit, (1 Ths. 5:21-22; 1 Jn. 4:1-14.) 

Spiritually, Jesus’ full atonement in our place made us spiritually perfect in God’s sight, (Col. 2:9-10.) Soulically or emotionally and humanly, we all need to be continually “transformed in our minds [or thoughts,] to know that…  perfect will of God,” (Rom. 12:1-2.)  Someone wisely said, “We must learn throughout or whole lives...  [because we are all in the school of the Holy Spirit.]  Hey, we even learn how to die when that moment comes, as we have never died before…” 

Home 

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Dealing with Abuse and Abusers God’s Way

Great Irreconcilable Differences between Psychology and Scriptural Truth 

 

Þ Mourning the Death or Loss of a Loved One  

Þ Read the book, illustrative of this study:  What Meddling Parents can do to Adult Children 

Þ How To Deal With a Parent, Spouse, Teenager or Grown Child, Who is Addicted to Destruction and People of Destruction 

Þ How to Avoid Getting Stuck in Bad Relationships      

Þ Does God speak through fear?  What is fear and how do I control it

 

 

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