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THE STRUGGLES OF PEOPLE WHO WERE SEXUALLY ABUSED ARE MULTIFOLD Renette Vermeulen
[Acknowledgement to the person who compiled and published this image]
© COPYRIGHT NOW UNBANNED PUBLICATIONS Please note The study of human behavior, as also found in psychology but not so much in clinical psychiatry, is the crux of this article; confirmed and guided by the never-changing, Scriptural Word of the Lord Jesus Christ. Nevertheless, as many psychologists also use psychiatry in their “talk therapy,” one must be careful to “test and prove everything to see if it is from God,” (1 Ths. 5:21-22.) Additionally, where the word “victim” is used, it does not mean a “victim mentality that merely seeks sympathy” or anything similar. It factually refers to the “injured parties,” “fatalities” or “casualties” of barnyard bullies, narcissists, psychopaths, child molesters, rapists, and other sadists.
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I AM FOR ALL ABUSED PEOPLE; especially those who were abused from childhood; those who suffered grave trauma, and those who have no physical means to escape the terrible oppression of destroyers. The abused usually continue to suffer under the multilevel oppression of sadistic butchers, who would never have been able to continue the abuse if they regretted even a single sin. Trauma, treason, and especially sexual abuse never affect only one part of the victim. It comes from the dark side of the spirit world onto the body and into the mind, from where it flows to every part of the sufferer’s life — if the person does not timeously take logic control of his or her thoughts and reactions. Because it’s origin is spiritual, only The Truth of God’s Word, (which is Spirit and Life,) the situation, the perpetrator, and the victim can set the abused free, (Jn. 6:63; 8:31-32 KJV.) So, disciples of Christ can take heart by knowing; even when He does not change the circumstances, they must keep on following Him wholeheartedly, because “all things will work together for good to those who love God…” (Rom. 8:28.)
The Lord CHANGES EVERYONE WHO CHOOSES TO OBEY HIM to “overcome” all evil by teaching them to mature their characters by growing intellectually and emotionally in understanding of His Word and Will, (Rom. 12:1-2.) Even when Joseph’s brothers sold him into slavery to Egypt, he could say to them in the end, “…I am in the place [where God placed me….] You meant evil against me, but God meant it for good…” (Gen. 50:19-20.) Maturing the characters Christ’s disciples is always a painful process. Although Jesus was God Himself in the flesh of a mere man during His ministry on earth, He learned obedience from what He suffered,” (Heb. 5:8.) No matter the sorrow and what comes with emotional and intellectual growth in Christ; wholehearted, Scriptural salvation in Him IS overall redemption from darkness, (Colossians 2:9-10.) Thus it is able to dissolve myriads of multi-tiered problems.
YET, THE HARSH FINGER MARKS OF ABUSERS ARE NOT EASILY ERASED from the souls (or minds) of the abused, because the Lord Jesus requires the willing “transformation” of their thoughts, beliefs, and behaviour to change them on a soulical or “mind” level, (Rom. 12:1-2; 1 Ths. 5:23.) This is so because nothing but His Scriptural Truth can save and deliver sufferers from the “strongholds in their minds,” which define memories, perceptions, knowledge, feelings, and actions, (2 Cor. 10:3-7.) After salvation, the continual “battle” is to bring thoughts and beliefs into obedience to Christ. If the minds of believers are left unrenewed, they will lack understanding and obedience to the will of God. That will lead disciples astray and worsen the misery of sufferers even long after the abuse has stopped, (Jam. 1:13-18.)
LET EVERY BELIEVER FORGET ABOUT SO-CALLED “INSTANT CHURCH DELIVERANCE.” The Lord warned, ‘[Even if clergies cast out demons left, right and center with their mambo-jumbo, familiar] spirits will always return. And if their ‘house’ is empty, [devoid of mental growth through obedience to God’s True Word,] each spirit will bring seven more wicked than itself and they will all enter that person and dwell there. So his state will be much worse than the first,’ (Mt. 12:43-45.) ► The christianized occult teachings and practices of clergies only open up the abused to greater demonic control and harassment. The problems of sexual and other abuse are complex and it is deadly to play with God and His Word like clergies do. Also, doctors and other medical workers might alleviate psychological and physical symptoms, but only the Lord Jesus Christ Himself is the Almighty Healer of those who seek Him on all levels of life, (Isa. 53:3-7.)
THE FOLLOWING IS SHOCKING BUT LIBERATING TRUTH. Sexual immorality is one of the worst roots of abuse, as it causes great spiritual, emotional, and physical disturbances in the lives of the deceived, innocent, and helpless. ►► While on death row, the narcissistic psychopath serial killer Ted Bundy said in an interview, “All the violent offenders I met in prison, just like me, without question or exception, every one of them was deeply involved, influenced, addicted, and consumed by pornography…” ► Serial murders probably start with child molestation and watching porn, to end with the brutal, perverse murder of unknown numbers of women, children, and even men. This is because the extreme physical and emotional trauma of sexual abuse is terrible in itself, but it’s spiritual implications are greater than anything else. Those joined to [male or female] harlots become one body, [soul or mind, and spirit] with [them,] while they must be “one spirit with the Lord,” (1 Cor. 3:16-17; 6:15-20.) This proves that sexual abuse is extremely destructive. ► The devil hates all innocence, holiness, and goodness because he hates God and His wonderful creation. The more he can violate humans on a multilevel, the easier they become his instruments to also obliterate everyone else they can lay their hands on, (1 Ths. 5:23.) Thus, through corrupt spouses, family, friends, and acquaintances, the devil recruits those who chose to be swallowed by abuse and other addictions, because they do not respect their own bodies, which were created in the image of God, (Jn. 1:12-13; Gen. 1:27-28!) Hence, in Satan’s attempt to desecrate everyone and everything that God created, one cannot begin to imagine how many evil spirits are transferred and so-called ‘soul ties’ or actually, trauma and treason bonds are enforced through sexual immorality and unbound violence, (Heb. 4:12.)
IT IS NO COINCIDENCE THAT THE NOTORIOUS SERIAL KILLER TED BUNDY SHOWED HOW VIOLENCE and all other forms of cruelty through narcissism and psychopathy,] accompany sexual crimes. ►► God rebuked the fornicating, adulterating priesthood of Old Israel as follows in Malachi 2:13-16, “I am witness between you and the wife of your youth, with whom you dealt treacherously, [by divorcing and cheating on your good wives] to take pagan women, [who mostly do not have qualms about fornication or pornography, which people now watch as entertainment: Malachi 2:11.] Yet, she is your companion and wife by covenant… [And I hate your fornication and adultery that result in divorce, Matthew 19:9,] as it covers your garments with violence…” ► God was speaking about their priestly attire, which symbolized their holy position and morals in Him. But once sexual crimes desecrate the human body, soul, and spirit, Satan follows up his ruin with unprecedented violence. ► Thus, where there is violence (and other desecrations such as alcohol abuse and drug addiction) in a home, there are fornication, adultery, and pornography behind the scenes. If someone has sex with anyone other than his or her spouse, it instantly breaks the holy marriage covenant between one husband and one wife, opens the whole family to the destruction of demons, and tears them apart, (Mt. 19:1-9!) ► That is why it is no wonder that children who were raised in such satanic brokenness can suffer, (and often also choose to make others suffer,) for the rest of their natural lives – if they never wholly believe in, accept, and follow Christ Jesus. It is certain that sexual immorality is always detrimental. But what is more devastating is the trend of many victims of sex crimes and violence, (violent raping as well as narcissist grooming for sexual molestation and pornography,) to also watch pornography and practise the satanic addictions, which their abusers exercised on them.
THE BASIC TRUTH, WHICH CAN SET THEM ALL FREE is that everything humans do are personal choices. In every bad situation, victims of abuse can choose to rebel against God - or they can think logic and choose to obey the True Word of Jesus Christ to be totally delivered from all kinds of evil. ► The most important step to freedom in Jesus, is to understand how dreadfully serious all kinds of sexual and other abuse are. The trauma and treason which abused people suffer are ghastly, although most cultures tend to make light of it all. Understating the devastating effects of sexual and other abuse, clarifies many of the issues sufferers struggle with. ►► Therefore it is necessary for them to “backtrack” without the motive of reminiscing over it in a self-destructive way. This is how sufferers can begin to understand the details that demolish them and come to terms with the real causes and extent of everything. ► For instance, various health issues, confusion, memory loss, unresolved anger, hatred, and frustration, “low self-esteem,” passive and overt aggression, narcissism, anxiety attacks and other phobias, “attention deficit, hyper activity,” and depression were all caused by past and ongoing emotional and physical stress. This could and can be secret or brutal attacks; once-off or constant harassment; terrorizing and the nonstop sabotaging of demon controlled abusers. ► According to the type, extent, severity, and the length of the abuse, and whether incest, bestiality, oral, (fellatio,) and/or anal sex, forced or willing prostitution, and other types of unnatural intercourse were involved or not, sufferers can also be overwhelmed by the fear of sex, (gynophobia,) hyper sexuality, (hyperphilla,) homosexual and lesbianism tendencies, etcetera. Once they are trauma and treason bonded to their abusers, the abused often suffer knowingly or unknowingly from Stockholm Syndrome, (yearning for the acceptance and ‘love’ of their abusers and venerating and defending them even after they died — instead of exposing them, (Eph. 5:11.) Sharing willing or unwillingly in those “fruitless works of darkness,” the abused probably also suffer from post traumatic stress, which also manifest in nightmares. (This is an attempt of the logic mind to understand and “decompose” what was done to the person.) Tragically, the satanic crimes that sufferers accepted from their abusers will open up further harassment from demons; including sex with male incubus and so-called succubus female demons, which can turn their nights into lust, filth, and terror, (Gen. 6:1-6.)
BECAUSE THE BEST ‘DEFENCE’ OF ABUSERS IS OFFENCE, they always fiercely pretend to be victims and deny that they victimize anyone. So, whether the real abused overcome the above mentioned dangers and afflictions to move emotionally to a place of acceptance and peace in Christ OR NOT, they must realize that they, and not their blame-shifting abusers, were or still are the innocent victims. ► The maltreatment that could have originally made their abusers into demonic instruments, was beyond the control of their victims. So, the self-blame, self-hatred, and despair of real victims, which can even result in suicide, are totally uncalled for. “None of us could know what they did not know.” ► It is a fundamental part of healing in the grace of Christ to forgive ourselves for the gullible trust, blind love, and the constant but futile forgiveness of abusers such as narcissist parents, spouses, and sex offenders. So, victims of abuse must let go of their guilt over the wrong choices they made to fall into the traps abusers set for them — especially those they made in early life. ► As all the disciples of Christ are in the School of the Holy Spirit until He comes to take them to their eternal home, they must see life as a constant learning curve to glorify Him in everything. ► It is useless that sufferers cut themselves for things they did not understand; could not expect; and which they gullibly participated in, (Lev. 19:28.) And when they realize that destructive trauma and treason befell them without reason, they must come to the realization that God always has a good reason why He allows bad things to happen to innocent people. ► It is natural that traumatized people will grapple with the question, “Why did God not intervene beforehand?” This is where trust in the omniscient God comes into play. In time they will understand why. But for now, it is enough to know that the trauma could have killed them, destroyed their minds, etcetera. The fact that it did not do more harm than they suffer, means that God was in control all the time. He will surely complete the good mind-renewing process and constant life-teachings He began in them — if they choose to unreservedly trust and follow Him, (Philippians 1:6-7.)
ALL VICTIMS OF ABUSE MUST REALIZE THAT GOD GAVE EVERYONE A FREE WILL AND HE WILL NEVER SAVE, redeem, or change anyone against their will, (Deut. 30:19; Jn. 1:12-13.) If abusers reject Jesus and His True Word, there is nothing anyone can do to change them. Believers in Christ can only change themselves by their own decisions to obediently follow Jesus, and to fully abandon darkness such as arguing and fighting with abusers in futile attempts to resolve detrimental situations, because that only feed evil people and make the stronger. ► God commanded believers to shun unrepentant people no matter who they are. If anyone loves “father, mother, [spouse, children, etcetera,] more than Jesus [by submitting to their evil,] they are not worthy to be His disciples,” (Mt. 10:37.) Accordingly, He commanded in Proverbs 22:10 KJV, “Cast out the scoffer and contention will leave. Yes, strive and reproach will cease!” “Do not be deceived, evil company corrupts good morals [and habits.] Awake to righteousness and do not [allow others that lead you into] sin...” (1 Cor. 15:33-34.) ►► As seen in Proverbs 22:10, the abused must radically stop to “enable” unrepentant abusers, (Romans 1:30-32,) by NOT fleeing physically from them if possible, and/or by NOT rejecting them and all their filth by exposing them once they, (the abused,) understand the severity of it all, (Eph. 5:11.) ► Those who turn love into abuse are haters and emotional and physical murderers, not lovers! (1 Jn. 3:14-15.) Do not believe, justify, or accept their manipulation, excuses, false promises, and lies. ► Stick with what Jesus said. Everyone will know them by their fruit or constant behavior! A “bad tree” or those who “speak lies in hypocrisy had their consciences sheared” and cannot bear good fruit, (Mt. 7:16-20; 1 Tim. 4:2!) In John 8:44, Jesus called them Satanists; saying, “You are of your father the devil as his will you [choose] to do. He was a murderer from the beginning and… is the father of lies.” If nothing “works” with abusers, sufferers must see them as dangerous, immoral psychopaths without a conscience, (2 Timothy 3:1-9.)
THERE IS NO SUCH THING THAT CLERGIES CAN SEND SPOUSES BACK TO FORGIVE UNENDINGLY WITHOUT REPENTANCE FROM ABUSERS; risking their lives to survive under their violence, manipulation, deception, adultery, and oppression! (Mt. 19:1-9!) The same goes for abused children and parents, and other victims who are tied to maniacs without literal resolve. ►► Truthfully, the abused themselves, if they are capable, must follow the Lord’s disciplinary steps in Matthew 18:15-20 as far as possible to deal with menacing people. ► Paul acknowledged in Galatians 2:5, “Do not yield [to sex-crazed whackos, deceivers, thieves, emotional and other murderers, torturers, and other destroyers] for even an hour that the Truth of the Gospel might continue in you,” (see 1 John 3:14-15.) If the abused submit to maniacs and accept them for what they are, they surrender their minds or souls to devils to mess with them as they please, (John 8:44!) All kinds of abusers “are slaves of corruption; for by whom a person is overcome, he is brought into bondage,” (2 Pt. 2:19.)
THOSE WHO SINCERELY SEEK “DELIVERANCE” OR ACTUALLY HEALING from even the deepest pain, sorrow, and anger must understand that sufferers cannot go to someone else to take control of their demonic problems as so-called ‘deliverers’ or exorcists claim they can do. ► Suffering, (just like sin,) can only be dealt with by the one whom it oppresses. Of course victims may seek ‘help’ by ‘venting’ their experiences and pain to those who can assist them, but they must only rely on Jesus; the Redeemer, Comforter and Healer Who makes them whole. And He commands total, lasting submission to Him and mind renewal through understanding and obeying His Genuine Word, to be really delivered and healed from everyone and everything that ruins, bothers, and upsets, (Rom. 12:1-2!) ► ► Scripturally, it starts with “PULLING DOWN” or eradicate all deceptive “STRONGHOLDS IN THEIR MINDS” to change persecutions, behavior, and lives, (2 Cor. 10:3-6.) (‘Casting out demons’ is not even suggested here.)
THIS IS HOW BOTH ABUSERS AND VICTIMS ARE TRULY HEALED AND CHANGED. ► It begins with abusers, (as other perpetrators,) sincerely regretting sin and honestly confessing it in detail to God and to their victims, (Mt. 5:21-26; Jam. 5:15-18.) Genuine restitution or restoration must follow. Then lasting repentance must validate it all. Most importantly, God commands to deal with serious sin. Concealing crimes such as abuse makes accomplices of those who do not call out sinners but look the other way, (Lev. 5:1,4-6,17; 6:1-5; Lu. 17:1-3; Eph. 5:11; Rom. 1:32!) This is NOT seeking revenge but resolving abuse. It calls for all sufferers of sexual and other abuse to receive all of the above from their abusers as far as possible, to understand what they have to deal with, (Jam 5:16-18; Luke 17:1-3! Lev. 6:1-5! ) All that is necessary so they can figure out and overcome the demolition that was done to their minds, bodies, and lives. ►► If abusers refuse to restore their crimes accordingly, (or if they are unreachable or deceased,) the abused must still unravel it to the fullest extent to find closure — before totally surrendering it all to God.
PERPETRATORS WHO SEEK FORGIVENESS must know that forgiveness can never be loosened from full confession, restitution, and repentance. ► No relationship can be constructed on dirty, malicious secrets, cruel manipulation, twisted facts, constant lies, and empty promises, (1 John 1:8-10; Isa. 1:18; Luke 17:1-3; Mt. 18:15-20.) Everyone must also realize that all forms of abusive behavior are extremely selfish. Thus, culprits must take full responsibility for the mostly unspoken struggles of innocent victims; (spouses especially,) who are hardly ever mentioned when dealing with the sins of child molesters, fornicators, rapists, violent and secretive oppressors, and adulterers. ► When everyone, (sufferers too,) have to give account before God, (2 Corinthians 5:10,) NO ONE will be able to blame anyone else for their decisions and sin, (Ezk. 18:19-20.) So, the abused must never believe or accept the blame-shifting of abusers to exonerate themselves in their own eyes. “The sins of [abusers to make their victims suffer] are their own.” And the legitimate sins of sufferers, when they also violate God’s inward Moral Law, are their own. That is not to say sufferers cannot get angry with abusers. Anger is a natural emotion that must be ‘decomposed’ by logic thought, understanding the facts of the whole situation, and submitting to the Truth of God’s Word. ► So, while anger is natural, sufferers must not hold on to it, but deal with it according to the precepts of God’s Law, (Eph. 4:26.)
WHEN ALL IS SAID AND DONE, decisive forgiveness “from the heart” will manifest when the abused make the firm decision to “let destroyers go” by prayerfully placing them and everything they have committed into God’s righteous Hands. This is not necessarily accompanied by a good feeling or any other emotion. In fact, it is impossible for sufferers to forgive and let go of gross, unrepentant abuse without surrendering themselves to God; asking and allowing Him to take over and reveal His peace in them under all circumstances. Because abuse comes from demonic assault, true forgiveness can only come from God’s mercy throne of light and life. The more sufferers refuse to hate and take vengeance, the more enduring they will seek God’s wisdom, mercy, and grace — and the less likely they will hate and get “their hands full of blood” like abusers do, (Isa. 59:2-5.) Dearly beloved, take these promises from the Most High God and stand in the will and power of the Lord Jesus Christ to get what you probably never had. No matter what happened in the past, abused disciples must decidedly and in complete dependency upon God’s Scriptural promises and the righteous application of it all by the Holy Spirit, constantly move forward in Christ. Do not despise little advances and do not be discouraged by failures. Should anyone fall, he must get right up and flee back to the feet of Jesus, (Jn. 6:37; 1 Jn. 1:8-10; Jam. 3:2.) “…Hold fast what you have and let no man takes your crown, [or everlasting life,]” (Rev. 3:11.) Sufferers are safe under the full protection of Christ Jesus as long as they remain at His feet. Psalm 72:12-19 promises, “He will deliver the needy when he cries. The poor also, and him who has no helper... and will save their souls. Blessed be the Lord God, Who only does wondrous things! And blessed be His glorious Name forever!” SOUL TIES: HOW TO OVERCOME ALL TYPES OF PEOPLE AND OTHER ADDICTION MOURNING A DECEASED OR LOST LOVED ONE? Getting punished for doing good? The Great ‘Deliverance’ Deception How to Avoid Getting Stuck in Bad Relationships
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